The Diary of Jen K

This piece resembles that of a hopeless schizophrenic’s notebook. The disconnected fragments which (probably) no one could understand should at least be mildly amusing. This is an excerpt from my “notebook”. Despite the title, this is not the actual diary of “Jen K”, but the trashing of “the dreams” of the vile creature she came from, which for the remainder will be known as “it”.

Enjoy.

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Pride.

Hope?

Still this… But it’s more or less, “go with the flow”. I’ll just put non-specific trust in that.

Let’s see where those pieces land…

How it trashes its dream: Because, “I CANT BE GAY”.

Japanese_Tea_Garden,_San_Francisco

I don’t see any ferries, do you?

So it would be appreciated if you stopped trying to convince me they exist somewhere at the bottom.

Or maybe Jen K’s “Giver of Life”, and all those dishonorable bitches that support it, refuse to face their inevitable defeat. (See: expended use)

How it trashes its dream: Because “I HAD TO BELIEVE IN GOD.”

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“ADMAX” Florence, CO (Domestic Terrorism detention)

Under the purported premise, you have made permanent solitary more than preferable.

How it trashes its dream: Because I’d rather lose my freedom then have that freedom include “It” or anything that sides with “it”.

That is almost all.

Short, sweet, and like a wall covered with pictures cut from magazines and connected by string in meaningful patterns.

End Game Addendum:

Even if I get nothing, just like I thought, knowing my defiance fucked up ALL their plans is ONE OF THE BEST FEELINGS EVER!!!

For example: Take ALL the hate and anger I felt after I quit my job (in round 1) which ended up with me having to use the system to get back and completely reverse it…

I may be in my car, broke, trying to sleep in my car in the day in the humid sun all while working shit jobs to stay afloat, but at least I can respect myself doing it. Plus, I avoided the most angering part of the first round, which was being rewarded for giving in.

So yeah, THIS, EVEN WITHOUT ANY FURTHER REWARD/PUNISHMENT, IS THE SWEETEST VICTORY OF MY FUCKING LIFE.

WHY?

I killed your stupid fucking game of faith! I beat some group, that according to “Jesus loves you, Justin” had “never lost”…. Until they came after me. Guess those “angels” weren’t so angelic after all, eh?

That’s all I need.

Actually, Enimem says it quite nicely for me:

Obligatory Taunt: Aw shucks, I guess I’ll never know who that person was they were trying to force me into a relationship with. Just hope they didn’t rearrange their life or anything and get roasted by their “solipsism”.

*one tear*

Anyway, here’s my Celebration:

This Planet of ours, and the ADVERSITY from which plant and animal life EVOLVES really allows for some tasty things to gluttonously indulge in.

Fortune: “Pack your bags. You are bound for an exciting new destination.”

Cuba?

Still, my favorite fortune of all time came in a broken cookie:

“Your ideals matter more to you then wealth or prosperity.”

THIS is peace.
THIS is SERENITY.
Amen.

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